There is this roller coaster at Cedar Point. I've only been there once, a month before the husband and I got married. But I wanted to go on this ride over and over. The husband still brings it up any time we talk with someone about Cedar Point. At the one high point of the coaster, just as it begins to drop- the climax- I laughed the most giddy school girl laugh apparently he has ever heard. No screams, no fear, just unadulterated joy.
There are times when life just feels like that. Things seem to be falling in line just as they should, marriage and relationships feel strong and life is just good. The husband is off to San Diego tomorrow to visit old friends and I start my job as a social worker for one of the large inner city high schools in our city. I am so excited about this job- my dream job. Sure, the state is threatening to take over this very school and that could put my job at risk yet again (I was laid off last year and re-hired). But right now I have a heightened sense of optimism. We are both doing what we want with our careers, and the husband with his education. We have come to a stage in our partnership that we've worked through any individual issues that may effect us as a couple. I have found peace and gratitude in starting a regular yoga practice, improving my gardening skills and finding a way to be more self accepting than I have been before.
I know there will always be difficulties ahead in our partnership, our marriage, our lives, but for right now I am savoring this time. I have no delusions that we still need to work at what we have to keep it going this well, but I also feel a sense of relieve that I can relinquish old anxieties and just enjoy life.
No comments:
Post a Comment