The cute culprit.
Saturday, December 10, 2011
No elves were harmed in the destruction of these santa hats
The cute culprit.
Advocacy, it's the least I can try to do
It does not fail that almost every day I am awe struck by another student. Their strength, their untimely wisdom, their courage, will and survival in a variety of circumstances that I can only attempt to understand, but never fully have a sense of their experiences.
I had hoped when I started this blog in August, I believe it was, that I would regularly share stories and experiences of my job as a social worker in an urban school. But, I have been so enraptured in the experience that the little time I have for myself I've used for time with my husband and rest/rejuvenation. The stress and exhaustion that I have experienced this semester is unlike any other job I have had, though. In past jobs, my stress from my work as an outpatient therapist or other social work roles led to burn out, moodiness, extreme fatigue. The stress I have now only promotes my motivation and love of the students I work with and the job I get to do every day.
I am working with many young women who are pregnant, from various backgrounds and with various levels of stability. I have to assist many of these women to ensure they have their basic needs met, some do not have medical coverage to receive prenatal care. A few are at great housing risk, which is obviously very concerning that they and their soon to be born child may be without a warm and stable home. I hear countless stories of survival with abusive parents, mothers who are in relationships with abusive men or drug dealers. So many of my students have lost someone they love to a violent or untimely death.
Yet, most of them continue on, trying as best they can to have a normal and fun high school and adolescent experience. Most students are so determined to get their high school diploma, many the first in their family. All I can really do is listen, support and maybe try to advocate for what they need. I think this is the central core of doing my job well. I have to advocate that a young woman with multiple serious medical issues, now pregnant with a child with many medical issues of his own, should have the computer at home so she can continue with her education. I have to advocate with the teachers who don't know the full picture at home to not be so hard on the student who is a little disruptive that day, because he's just trying to get through the day without thinking about how the issues at home and on the street. I also have to advocate that in an urban, predominantly African-American school, there are students who deserve and need an after school club to feel safe about who they are, including their sexuality.
I feel proud and privileged to be a part of these young people's lives. Working to do whatever they need to support them in obtaining their goals is the least I can do. And I love it.
I had hoped when I started this blog in August, I believe it was, that I would regularly share stories and experiences of my job as a social worker in an urban school. But, I have been so enraptured in the experience that the little time I have for myself I've used for time with my husband and rest/rejuvenation. The stress and exhaustion that I have experienced this semester is unlike any other job I have had, though. In past jobs, my stress from my work as an outpatient therapist or other social work roles led to burn out, moodiness, extreme fatigue. The stress I have now only promotes my motivation and love of the students I work with and the job I get to do every day.
I am working with many young women who are pregnant, from various backgrounds and with various levels of stability. I have to assist many of these women to ensure they have their basic needs met, some do not have medical coverage to receive prenatal care. A few are at great housing risk, which is obviously very concerning that they and their soon to be born child may be without a warm and stable home. I hear countless stories of survival with abusive parents, mothers who are in relationships with abusive men or drug dealers. So many of my students have lost someone they love to a violent or untimely death.
Yet, most of them continue on, trying as best they can to have a normal and fun high school and adolescent experience. Most students are so determined to get their high school diploma, many the first in their family. All I can really do is listen, support and maybe try to advocate for what they need. I think this is the central core of doing my job well. I have to advocate that a young woman with multiple serious medical issues, now pregnant with a child with many medical issues of his own, should have the computer at home so she can continue with her education. I have to advocate with the teachers who don't know the full picture at home to not be so hard on the student who is a little disruptive that day, because he's just trying to get through the day without thinking about how the issues at home and on the street. I also have to advocate that in an urban, predominantly African-American school, there are students who deserve and need an after school club to feel safe about who they are, including their sexuality.
I feel proud and privileged to be a part of these young people's lives. Working to do whatever they need to support them in obtaining their goals is the least I can do. And I love it.
Winter coziness
“Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is the time for home.”
― Edith Sitwell
Oh, how I wish we had a fire place. I am tempted to have a roaring outdoor fire with lots of layers on, but I just don't think our chiminea would cut it. Otherwise, this quote suits my recent mood perfectly. With the bitter cold coming in and the sun is still not rising until after 7am, I am most content with a cup of coffee or tea, bundled up at home with the husband, the dogs (the cat watching nearby) and a good book. I keep saying I am going to get back into regular running mode as early prep for half marathon training (officially starting in January), but the cozy indoors are much more tempting.
― Edith Sitwell
Oh, how I wish we had a fire place. I am tempted to have a roaring outdoor fire with lots of layers on, but I just don't think our chiminea would cut it. Otherwise, this quote suits my recent mood perfectly. With the bitter cold coming in and the sun is still not rising until after 7am, I am most content with a cup of coffee or tea, bundled up at home with the husband, the dogs (the cat watching nearby) and a good book. I keep saying I am going to get back into regular running mode as early prep for half marathon training (officially starting in January), but the cozy indoors are much more tempting.
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
New commitments
I am not sure if I can get this blog going. . . Partly because I have been so busy with work and life, when I have time to stop, I'd rather rest than write. Also because when I think about writing, it either feels like things I shouldn't post publicly or it is things I am not sure anyone would care about.
I haven't let go of this idea yet, I just need to keep at it to evolve it into what I want it to be. I realized today I haven't done a thing with it in coming on two months now. That's no good for a blog. So, what I have been up too- a new puppy entered our life. Buddy. He's the little white one next to Nia. It's been an adjustment for all of us. We love him and he quickly became a part of the family, but I forgot what a pain teaching a puppy can be. So that has consumed a lot of time. I look forward to when he learns what "come here" means and can go a week with an accident.
Work also kind of took over, but not in a negative way necessarily. I have established myself among certain teachers and students as the person they seek out for support. It feels good to know I have a large handful of kids that trust me and come see me regularly for support. Our school is in the process of being taken over by the state, which has led, it seems to me, many people to work harder than they ever did before. A large part of my responsibility as a school social worker is addressing attendance. We have so many students who are truant, this too consumes much of my week. It's actually the least favorite part for me. While I value the importance of attendance and want to address whatever may be going to keep a kid from school, I also sometimes feel like it takes me away from the kids there who are invested and actively seeking supports and an education. It's a tightrope.
In addition to my regular duties and roles, I have started a Girls on the Run program with middle school aged girls. I highly value this time and this program. I have about 8 girls who come consistently. The group cohesion we've developed and there responsiveness to what I am sharing with them is wonderful. We are expected to run a 5K at the end. I am not sure if the girls are moving quickly enough towards this, but I know they are getting many other benefits mentally, emotionally, physically. I have pushed myself to challenge them more and it proved successful. At my last meeting with them, I had them increase their laps from about 2 to 8 without any internal expectation they would go that far.
On the home front, in addition to Buddy, the husband and I are thinking and planning a lot about the next few years of our lives. This is nothing new really- we are both daydreamers. But it feels like we are now starting to put some of our dreams (individual and as a family) into action, or at least taking the steps to be able to put them into action. With the excitement of what we hope to come, I have been daydreaming/procrastinating/planning in excess about some of what we hope to accomplish.
In order to not let my daydreams and excessive planning get in the way of all I am doing now, I am using my yoga practice to help me feel more grounded, centered and at peace with each day, each week, as it comes. As a non religious person who still seeks some sort of spiritual grounding, I have finally found that in my yoga practice. I am attending about 5 times a week and hope to build up to daily. Although I may not attend daily classes, the ideas, the focus on calming my mind and developing my breath is remaining with me throughout each day.
So, with all these things, I should still be able to make time to write, practice creativity in other ways and accomplish some of the other floating goals. I just have to take action and do it. I plan to try again, so stay tuned.
I haven't let go of this idea yet, I just need to keep at it to evolve it into what I want it to be. I realized today I haven't done a thing with it in coming on two months now. That's no good for a blog. So, what I have been up too- a new puppy entered our life. Buddy. He's the little white one next to Nia. It's been an adjustment for all of us. We love him and he quickly became a part of the family, but I forgot what a pain teaching a puppy can be. So that has consumed a lot of time. I look forward to when he learns what "come here" means and can go a week with an accident. Work also kind of took over, but not in a negative way necessarily. I have established myself among certain teachers and students as the person they seek out for support. It feels good to know I have a large handful of kids that trust me and come see me regularly for support. Our school is in the process of being taken over by the state, which has led, it seems to me, many people to work harder than they ever did before. A large part of my responsibility as a school social worker is addressing attendance. We have so many students who are truant, this too consumes much of my week. It's actually the least favorite part for me. While I value the importance of attendance and want to address whatever may be going to keep a kid from school, I also sometimes feel like it takes me away from the kids there who are invested and actively seeking supports and an education. It's a tightrope.
In addition to my regular duties and roles, I have started a Girls on the Run program with middle school aged girls. I highly value this time and this program. I have about 8 girls who come consistently. The group cohesion we've developed and there responsiveness to what I am sharing with them is wonderful. We are expected to run a 5K at the end. I am not sure if the girls are moving quickly enough towards this, but I know they are getting many other benefits mentally, emotionally, physically. I have pushed myself to challenge them more and it proved successful. At my last meeting with them, I had them increase their laps from about 2 to 8 without any internal expectation they would go that far.
On the home front, in addition to Buddy, the husband and I are thinking and planning a lot about the next few years of our lives. This is nothing new really- we are both daydreamers. But it feels like we are now starting to put some of our dreams (individual and as a family) into action, or at least taking the steps to be able to put them into action. With the excitement of what we hope to come, I have been daydreaming/procrastinating/planning in excess about some of what we hope to accomplish.
In order to not let my daydreams and excessive planning get in the way of all I am doing now, I am using my yoga practice to help me feel more grounded, centered and at peace with each day, each week, as it comes. As a non religious person who still seeks some sort of spiritual grounding, I have finally found that in my yoga practice. I am attending about 5 times a week and hope to build up to daily. Although I may not attend daily classes, the ideas, the focus on calming my mind and developing my breath is remaining with me throughout each day.
So, with all these things, I should still be able to make time to write, practice creativity in other ways and accomplish some of the other floating goals. I just have to take action and do it. I plan to try again, so stay tuned.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Ten Tips for the Beginning Gardener- Notes to Self
- Start seeds inside. Yes, it does make a difference. You'll have produce sooner.
- Give tomatoes and squash A LOT of room. They may start small, but they definitely don't stay that way. In fact, maybe give squash it's own location in another part of the yard.
- Think more about what you eat- look to plant at least kale, celery, cukes next year. Keep the other good essentials- tomatoes, peppers, broccoli, other greens/lettuce, squash, herbs. This means. . . dig up more of the yard next year... or find other creative places to have food growing amongst the landscape.
- Weed twice a week, but leave the purslane because you can eat that too.
- Talk more to the plants. It's okay. No one can hear you but them.
- Have more stakes handy and know how to use them. Or find a better system for the ever expanding tomato plants.
- Make sure all poison ivy is cleared from the area before beginning a garden
- Don't go on vacation too long. You're garden will miss you and it will show.
- Plant more marigolds. They are a beautiful and functional border.
- Keep a log of watering to avoid thinking "I watered yesterday right? I don't think they need it today."
Thursday, August 25, 2011
A Children's Book for Dieting
I am amazed that there are so many people out there that still think it is okay to make girls be healthy and fit by scaring them into how they should be. And how they should be to these people, is often not what any body should be. I struggled with self- image and self-acceptance most of my life. From being bullied in junior high, to becoming way too thin on an unhealthy vegan diet in high school and all the in betweens in my 20s. It has taken my to my 30s to realize that as long as I am healthy, active and feel well, I am okay.
Now I can't post all the blame to society or peers for my past self-image difficulties, but I do not see how anyone can deny that outside sources play a part in how we as a society view girls and women. I know a hell of a lot of "thin" girls that are unhealthy because they consume sodas, processed foods and rarely exercise, but are able based on their make up to appear thin. But their organs are not happy on the inside. Why does it have to be about dieting and being thin? Why is the focus not on being HEALTHY and ACTIVE. These are the keys to longevity and happiness.
I rant a little because I recently read about Maggie Goes on a Diet and it infuriated me. I really hate the word diet- it should be Maggie changes her lifestyle, or anything else less demeaning. I found out about this book from Kathy of Happy Healthy Life who also posts at Family Kitchen. I agree with her sentiments. Why does the focus when communicating to young girls have to be focused on their size? Young girls are so incredibly sensitive to all feedback they receive. While at that developmental stage they are trying to assert their independence, they are also still craving the loving support and attention they had as little girls.
The focus for any child and any adult is that we want to eat well and live well. All this means is eating lots of whole and fresh foods and staying physically active, as well as finding a source to care for your self mentally and spiritually. It is not that hard. And if all girls were taught the strengths of these behaviors- we may not all be a thin magazine image but we will all be healthy on the inside and out.
Rant completed.
Now I can't post all the blame to society or peers for my past self-image difficulties, but I do not see how anyone can deny that outside sources play a part in how we as a society view girls and women. I know a hell of a lot of "thin" girls that are unhealthy because they consume sodas, processed foods and rarely exercise, but are able based on their make up to appear thin. But their organs are not happy on the inside. Why does it have to be about dieting and being thin? Why is the focus not on being HEALTHY and ACTIVE. These are the keys to longevity and happiness.
I rant a little because I recently read about Maggie Goes on a Diet and it infuriated me. I really hate the word diet- it should be Maggie changes her lifestyle, or anything else less demeaning. I found out about this book from Kathy of Happy Healthy Life who also posts at Family Kitchen. I agree with her sentiments. Why does the focus when communicating to young girls have to be focused on their size? Young girls are so incredibly sensitive to all feedback they receive. While at that developmental stage they are trying to assert their independence, they are also still craving the loving support and attention they had as little girls.
The focus for any child and any adult is that we want to eat well and live well. All this means is eating lots of whole and fresh foods and staying physically active, as well as finding a source to care for your self mentally and spiritually. It is not that hard. And if all girls were taught the strengths of these behaviors- we may not all be a thin magazine image but we will all be healthy on the inside and out.
Rant completed.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
The fun part of the roller coaster
There is this roller coaster at Cedar Point. I've only been there once, a month before the husband and I got married. But I wanted to go on this ride over and over. The husband still brings it up any time we talk with someone about Cedar Point. At the one high point of the coaster, just as it begins to drop- the climax- I laughed the most giddy school girl laugh apparently he has ever heard. No screams, no fear, just unadulterated joy.
There are times when life just feels like that. Things seem to be falling in line just as they should, marriage and relationships feel strong and life is just good. The husband is off to San Diego tomorrow to visit old friends and I start my job as a social worker for one of the large inner city high schools in our city. I am so excited about this job- my dream job. Sure, the state is threatening to take over this very school and that could put my job at risk yet again (I was laid off last year and re-hired). But right now I have a heightened sense of optimism. We are both doing what we want with our careers, and the husband with his education. We have come to a stage in our partnership that we've worked through any individual issues that may effect us as a couple. I have found peace and gratitude in starting a regular yoga practice, improving my gardening skills and finding a way to be more self accepting than I have been before.
I know there will always be difficulties ahead in our partnership, our marriage, our lives, but for right now I am savoring this time. I have no delusions that we still need to work at what we have to keep it going this well, but I also feel a sense of relieve that I can relinquish old anxieties and just enjoy life.
There are times when life just feels like that. Things seem to be falling in line just as they should, marriage and relationships feel strong and life is just good. The husband is off to San Diego tomorrow to visit old friends and I start my job as a social worker for one of the large inner city high schools in our city. I am so excited about this job- my dream job. Sure, the state is threatening to take over this very school and that could put my job at risk yet again (I was laid off last year and re-hired). But right now I have a heightened sense of optimism. We are both doing what we want with our careers, and the husband with his education. We have come to a stage in our partnership that we've worked through any individual issues that may effect us as a couple. I have found peace and gratitude in starting a regular yoga practice, improving my gardening skills and finding a way to be more self accepting than I have been before.
I know there will always be difficulties ahead in our partnership, our marriage, our lives, but for right now I am savoring this time. I have no delusions that we still need to work at what we have to keep it going this well, but I also feel a sense of relieve that I can relinquish old anxieties and just enjoy life.
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